A Fragile Heart Carries the Strongest Soul

Audrey’s* fragile heart wasn’t just the one beating in her chest. Her spiritual heart knew about God but undergoing a heart transplant opened the door for her to know Him.

Joyful celebrations are occurring today, one year after her transplant, because both her physical heart and her spiritual heart are beating stronger than ever.

* Her real name is used with permission.

No Previous Heart Issues

Audrey’s love for softball began at age five. She felt alive every time she and her team took to the field.

No previous heart issues warned her about experiencing cardiac arrest on the softball field at age sixteen. She doesn’t remember anything about the cardiac arrest or how she arrived at the hospital. “When my mom explained what happened, I didn’t realize how serious it was. Like any other teenager, I felt invincible.”

During her two weeks in the hospital, tests revealed she had a rare, genetic heart condition known as Catecholaminergic polymorphic ventricular tachycardia (CPVT). Increases in physical activity or emotional stress cause the abnormally high heart rhythms.

CPVT and the often-resulting cardiac arrest is a cause of sudden death in infant and children. For this reason, Audrey believes having a defibrillator at the softball field where she was playing was no coincidence. It quite literally saved her life.

Fragile Heart

Surgery to implant a defibrillator to monitor and regulate Audrey’s fragile heart worked well for a while. After the second “shock” while at homecoming with a young man named Matt, her doctor performed another surgery, adding an additional lead for sensing irregularities.

“The hardest part was learning I couldn’t play softball anymore. It had been my life. I had a hard time coping with it. It took me longer to walk to classes, because I couldn’t get my heart rate up too high,” Audrey remembers.

She struggled with all the changes, but she felt blessed. “God looked out for me as I wouldn’t have survived otherwise.”

The Rest of Her Life

The occasional palpitations she felt were warning signs.  Stressful environments or becoming too emotional caused the palpitations. Her doctors monitored her every three to six months to keep an eye on her heart’s functioning.

At such a young age, Audrey struggled with knowing she would have to have a defibrillator monitoring her heart for the rest of her life. She wondered how her dreams of having a large family would be impacted with her fragile heart condition.

Audrey and Matt reconnected during college. They married when she was 22.

She and Matt wanted children, so they were devastated when a miscarriage happened. She questioned God: “Why me? We’ve already been through so much. We just want a child.”

Strength and Understanding

A replacement defibrillator was implanted when Audrey was 23. Soon after, she and Matt began trying again, only to face another miscarriage.

“We prayed together for strength and understanding. We knew our babies were in heaven, but it still was hard that they weren’t here with us in our arms,” Audrey shared. Enjoying time together as a young married couple offered a respite from the sadness. Not long after, they received the news they were expecting again. Joy filled their home.

Because of her heart issues, frequent testing occurred during her pregnancy, which revealed a malformation in the baby’s lungs. She and Matt asked the question, “Why us?” The question soon faded. Instead, we declared, “God has been with us this whole time. And He was giving us this sweet miracle.”

Follow up testing a few visits later showed nothing in their daughter’s lungs!

The Child We’d Prayed For

“It seemed like the struggles brought us closer. I think it’s because you spend so much time together in those deep, deep lows praying and asking God for a miracle. We knew we could keep going as we’d made it this far.”

Throughout her pregnancy, EKGs and device checks evaluated how her heart was functioning. Audrey began experiencing heart palpitations in the third trimester, so she agreed to meet her cardiologist at the Emergency Room. A natural delivery would stress her body, so their daughter Peyton was delivered by C-section at thirty-seven weeks.

“Matt told me later that as soon as they delivered Peyton and the umbilical cord was cut, the palpitations stopped. The child we’d prayed for was finally here, and I didn’t have anything else to worry about.”

“Seeing Peyton for the first time was overwhelming. She was a true miracle!”

Decreased Heart Functioning

After giving birth to Peyton, her doctors expressed concern about the health of her heart. More testing led to a diagnosis of Peripartum cardiomyopathy (PPCM), which often occurs in pregnant women. PPCM causes your heart to become larger around the time of delivery.

The symptoms she experienced during pregnancy returned. “New mom exhaustion” surely explained the relentless fatigue she felt. She realized she couldn’t walk far without resting. An echocardiogram at her two-month post-delivery appointment revealed decreased heart functioning.  It was functioning at 35-40%.

Her cardiologist referred her to a heart failure specialist. “We were not expecting his referral. It was scary,” Audrey shared. “Of course we shed tears, but we held on to the words ‘some people fully recover.’ I decided I WOULD BE one of those people.”

Valued Having Family Near

The heart failure specialist discussed three options and their outcomes: try targeted medications and recover, try targeted medications and have the LVAD (Left ventricle assist device) implanted when the medications didn’t work, or have a heart transplant. Knowing the LVAD usually was a band aid until a heart was available for a transplant concerned Audrey. “I didn’t believe I would ever have a heart transplant.”

She prayed and believed her heart would grow stronger by trying the medication. Her family and Matt’s family lived in a nearby city, so she, Matt, and Peyton moved into a camper in her in-law’s backyard. A plan to build a house near their families relieved some of her stress. She valued having family near. However, she continued to feel fatigued and needed their help with caring for Peyton.

Upon moving back to her hometown, Audrey felt drawn to the church she attended in her youth. The words of the songs and the sermon messages came at just the right moments, encouraging her and reconnecting her with God.

Replace Her Fragile Heart

An echocardiogram revealed her numbers dropped 20-25% more at her follow-up appointment five months later. Up until this point, she only shared the news of her fragile heart with her family. Learning the medicine wasn’t working led her to share her condition on social media so friends would know, too.

“We were overwhelmed with love and support from friends. Our community rallied around us. I needed their love and support as we were nearing Peyton’s first Christmas, and I was scared I wouldn’t make it to the next one,” Audrey shared.

When Audrey was referred to the heart transplant clinic, the reality hit hard that there was a dire need to replace her fragile heart. “As scared as I was, I thanked God for such a loving and calm child who would lie with me and play with her toys and for a loving, supportive husband. My mom had recently retired and could devote her time to taking care of me. God laid out the perfect plan for all that was about to happen.”

Functioning at 10%

In February of 2019, Audrey underwent four days of testing that included an evaluation to see if she qualified for a heart transplant. Test results confirmed she needed a new heart. Her name was added to the transplant list. That meant she could rest at home until a heart was available, which could take up to two years.

While she waited, Audrey accepted Christ as her Savior and was baptized. “I knew He was going to give me strength to get through it.”

In June, her doctor ordered her to stay at the hospital as her numbers didn’t look good. Her heart was only functioning at 10%. The LVAD surgery was the necessary next step.

Her doctors performed the LVAD surgery later that month. She went home until a heart was available. Her reasons for fighting – Matt and Peyton – loved and encouraged her during the difficult days of waiting.

 

A Perfect Heart

On October 11th at 2:00 in the morning, Audrey received a call that a perfect heart was available. “God’s provision was evident as Matt was not at work. And there was no traffic to slow us down in the middle of the night.”

Audrey’s doctors proclaimed her heart transplant a success. A good prognosis followed. Those words still echo in Audrey’s mind today as she looks at the year-old scar on her chest. She believes that scar represents a healthy human heart and a healthy spiritual heart.

During her years of living with a fragile heart, a strong soul grew to understand these words of wisdom: “We tried so much to control every little thing and how could we fix this. We just had to stop and lay it all out to God, fall on our knees, and ask Him to hold us. I had to learn that my health wasn’t something I could control. It was all in His will and in His ultimate plan. I learned to really lean into His love.”

Leave a reply (below): Audrey believes “Overcoming is letting go and trusting God. Let go of the fear. Let go of the unknown. KNOW that God has you, and He has the ultimate plan. When you know He is always by your side, the strength you have is untouchable. He always wins. He is the ultimate overcomer.”

A healthy heart finally resided in Audrey’s body at age 28. So young for such a serious surgery. But she would tell you that accepting God’s deep love for her was an incredible blessing to come out of her toughest struggles. Do you see your toughest struggles as blessings?