Overflow with Hope

Just like most newlyweds, Kimberly* and Greg dreamed of a family. About the time they decided to start trying, Kimberly noticed she was spotting between periods. Her gynecologist suspected it was an infection and asked her to wait three months for it to clear up.

Once the inflection was gone, they were blessed to become pregnant. Their hearts overflowed with hope.

* Her real name is used with permission.

The Baby Was Thriving

Kimberly’s hope faltered when her gynecologist examined her at her first prenatal visit. Instead of congratulating her, she said, “A healthy cervix doesn’t look like that. Yours looks a little like bloody ground beef.”

“Her words scared me. It was surreal. I knew it couldn’t be good, but I didn’t know what it meant. Was my baby going to be healthy? Was it OK for me to be pregnant?” she remembers.

Frequent sonograms showed the baby was thriving. However, the message of her cervix not being healthy continued throughout her pregnancy. Her gynecologist and the high-risk pregnancy specialists assured her numerous times she and the baby would be OK.

“Greg and I chose to trust them and to hang on to the positive.”

Prayed for Protection

In anticipation of their baby arriving in September, Greg and Kimberly spent the Fourth of July weekend decorating their baby’s room. “Joy and anticipation and excitement filled our conversation that day.”

After putting on her pajamas that night, she felt something between her legs. “I noticed I was bleeding badly. It felt as if our baby was being born,” she remembers.

Kimberly screamed for Greg to come help. Her gynecologist directed Greg to get her to the hospital as quickly as possible. “As Greg drove, we prayed for protection for our unborn child. Even though our fears were great, we hung onto hope that God was with all three of us.”

No One Had Any Answers

The examination revealed Kimberly’s cervix prolapsed. She began having contractions. Because she was only seven months pregnant, her gynecologist stopped the contractions with medication. She thought it best for Kimberly to remain in the hospital until her baby was born.

Her doctor’s concerns about losing the baby filled Kimberly and Greg with fear. “I couldn’t sleep that night. My heart was racing from the medication. Anxious thoughts filled my head about our baby’s health. And still no one had any answers about what was wrong with me.”

Kimberly’s cervix retracted that night, much to the surprise of her doctors, so she was sent home the next day. Bed rest was prescribed until her due date to protect her and the baby.

Didn’t Experience Any Complications

Their daughter, Hannah, was born on Labor Day weekend. Despite all the concerns during her pregnancy, Kimberly didn’t experience any complications during childbirth. And Hannah was perfectly healthy, too!

Wanting to have her baby naturally, Kimberly was disappointed when her cervix wouldn’t dilate and the recommendation was to deliver the baby by C-section. That disappointment only lasted until she saw her beautiful daughter.

“When they put her in my arms, all the fear and worry I felt during my pregnancy disappeared.”

It’s Time You See an Oncologist

With no symptoms after childbirth, Kimberly was confident she was as healthy as Hannah. That is, until her six weeks postpartum appointment.

“At that appointment, things went from first gear to fifth gear in an instant,” Kimberly remembers. Her gynecologist said, “It’s time you see an oncologist. Your cervix looks angry.”

All the comments during her pregnancy about her unhealthy cervix flooded her mind and filled her with fear. Not being able to get an appointment with the recommended oncologist added to her fear.

Thankfully, another oncologist examined Kimberly a few days later. “The biopsy revealed I had cervical cancer. My oncologist recommended a radical hysterectomy, which included taking my ovaries.”

January is Cervical Health Awareness Month. Click HERE to learn more.

We Can Adopt

Without being told outright, Kimberly knew their dreams of having more children were ending. Or were they? Greg grabbed her hand and they said to one another, “We can adopt.” During her interview, Kimberly added, “We talked about that as a possibility even before we had Hannah.”

Eleven days later, Kimberly underwent surgery. The cancer hadn’t spread to her lymph nodes, but her oncologist recommended six weeks of radiation to address the spots of cancer in her lymphovascular space. “I agreed to the radiation as I didn’t want any chance of the cancer coming back.”

“It was a blessing that Hannah was already sleeping through the night. So recovery, as silly as it sounds, was magical. I had a baby who needed me. During the day, we cuddled and I healed.”

Treatments Took Their Toll

However, the daily radiation treatments took their toll: fissures in her colon, extreme pain, and hives. Her cancer diagnosis, along with the hysterectomy and radiation treatments, ushered in a mild depression.

“I felt broken. Not being able to give birth to any more children made me feel like a failure. I worried about how my health struggles impacted Greg. I knew he was going through this, too,” Kimberly shared.

Three years after Hannah was born, Kimberly’s Bible study leader taught a lesson about the Bible character, Hannah. She said her name meant “God’s grace.” Kimberly recalled a vivid dream she had well before she was pregnant. “In that dream, I had a little girl named Hannah.”

“Tears flowed. In that moment, I felt so protected by God. It was by God’s grace I ever got pregnant. My pregnancy with Hannah literally saved my life. I would never have known I had cervical cancer if I hadn’t had Hannah.”

“Hannah has been a blessing in so many ways. She truly is God’s grace,” Kimberly shared.

Made All the Difference

Years passed and Kimberly was eager to start the adoption process, but Greg wasn’t ready.

Five years after Hannah was born, things began stirring in Greg’s heart. Steven Curtis Chapman discussed adopting his daughter from China during one of his concerts. Greg looked at her and said, “I think I’m ready.”

Kimberly and Greg went to an adoption expo a few weeks later. The founder of Chinese Children Adoption International shared his adoption story and how it made all the difference in his life. Their hearts were convicted. Learning the process usually took six to eight months, they went home and quickly filled out the paperwork.

Overflow of Hope

The expected six to eight months passed with no news. Kimberly and Greg leaned hard on their faith as they waited. Believing in and repeating Romans 15:13 led to an overflow of hope. Hope that a baby would soon be theirs.

Romans 15:13 says, “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”

And after twenty-seven months of waiting, a baby girl was added to their family. Lindsay’s “gotcha day” was June 24, 2007.

Kimberly and Greg cannot imagine their lives without Lindsay. “She brings such joy and laughter to our home. Lindsay has an infectious zest for life. Despite having some learning challenges, she is confident and resourceful,” Kimberly shared. “She is wise beyond her years, yet she maintains an innocent youthfulness. And she is in no hurry to grow up!”

Expanded Our Family

“Looking back, I see how God molded our family perfectly. My pregnancy with Hannah revealed my cancer. Truly God’s grace. Cancer treatment should have ended our dreams of expanding our family, but God already had Lindsay in mind. When the time was right, He expanded our family through adoption.”

Kimberly learned God’s timing is not our timing. “We don’t always immediately know the blessings God has in store, but we can trust in His plan for us. When we do, we will overflow with hope,” she shared.

When Kimberly thinks about her journey, she offers this advice: “There is a fine line between advocacy for our health and overreacting/paranoia about the worst-case scenario. I believe this is why so many of us don’t question our medical professionals thoroughly enough as we fear being perceived as difficult. I encourage others to ask questions and research your diagnosis. Most importantly, pray for God’s direction.”

Leave a reply (below): Kimberly believes overcoming is facing a trial/challenge head on and moving through it one step at a time. “You’ll come out on the other side changed. It’s important to recognize it’s change for the better. You’ll be different but better.”

How have trials/challenges changed you for the better?