So often you hear the cliché’ “where the mind leads the heart will follow.” I will not refute that. What I will say is that we often do not truly make the connection. I can honestly say I did not for many years. For me mindset was an afterthought; I was always a glass half empty type of girl. If I am being totally honest, I never saw the upside of too many things, well not for myself. I found it easy to be positive for others.

The world is full of pessimistic and optimistic people. The optimists are usually the ones who get on our (pessimists) nerves. This is in part because depending on the hand you were dealt in life you could have a difficult time viewing things and situations from a positive perspective. I lived that way for forty-six years of my life.

My friend and guest blogger, Tenishia Lester, is an author, speaker, and certified life & business coach. She enjoys baking cakes and pies from scratch. Traveling the world and speaking is on her bucket list. 

The Glass Is Refillable

I can recall the day I heard a totally new perspective on the “glass” analogy. It wasn’t ‘half full’ or ‘half empty.’ The point that stuck with me is “The glass is refillable!” I just about fell out of my chair when that statement assaulted my ears. Yes, I said assaulted because it felt like a one of those smacks you see cartoon characters dish out and the spit comes flying out of the recipient’s mouth in slow motion. Or better yet, if you are a boxing fan, it’s like the slow-motion replay of a devastating knockout blow; the one that requires the referee to leap onto the mat for the countdown before announcing the new champion.

That was a revolutionary thought. And truthfully, we have a choice to do it all the time. Think about being at a restaurant and ordering your favorite drink. You wouldn’t want the server to ignore your need for a refill, would you? Again, we have a choice to refill it when our glass is half full or half empty. How many times have you chosen to refill the contents of your glass on any given day? 

So, let’s dig a little deeper here. What has been plaguing you to cause you to be a pessimist or operate from a fixed mindset? There are several ways in which our thought processes are formed: childhood environments, experiences, what you heard/learned and examples.

Fixed Mindset or Growth Mindset?

You have adopted mindsets that are either fixed or growth. A fixed mindset is one in which you fail to see or recognize the ability, capability, or reason for change. In contrast is the growth mindset, which allows you to see the plethora of possibilities, capabilities, and talents that can be developed or retrained overtime to create new habits, mindsets, and beliefs.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Some people live their whole lives with a fixed mindset. We all know at least one person you can readily visualize. They buck at the thought of change and will try their best to fight against it at every turn. I will say I saw the possibility of growth to a point, but there always seemed to be a hinderance that I could never quite seem to put my finger on.

What’s Your Purpose?

Let’s take for instance the subject of purpose. I grew up in church, so my perspective has a Christian flare. I was raised hearing God had a purpose for each of our lives. Now that is great, but it left me with plenty of questions like: how do I know what my purpose is? How do I find it? Questions you too may have posed. You see mindset and purpose go hand in hand. Purpose is the reason you and I were created.

Unfortunately, this led to years of searching and changing majors in college, only to still not having obtained my degree. But that is neither here nor there at this point, because I am happy to say I have discovered my purpose. My point is that if my mindset had remained in a fixed position, I could have easily thrown up my hands and never continued my pursuit of purpose. It would have been easy to say, “Forget it. There is no use!” And there were times when I did. That mindset led me to a position of being disheartened for a time. 

Yet, I knew a couple of things: my purpose was out there. I had to find it. Certainly, God would not let me die until it was fulfilled. And I was frustrated not knowing it. I never received any tangible answers to my questions; instead, I was simply told to pray. I have nothing against prayer, in fact it is vital. However, I needed practical steps and wisdom, too.

Take Inventory of Thought Processes and Mindset

That compilation of feelings led me to begin to really take inventory of my thought processes and mindset. The first step to changing any situation is recognizing and admitting there is a problem that needs to be addressed. From there, it is imperative to begin to seek the proper resources that will help to lead you in the correct direction.

And it will happen for you. Just as you have a purpose and a voice, someone out there has been purposed specifically for your issue/challenge to give language to spur you on into your destiny/purpose. Sometimes you will hear those people referred to as “your tribe.” Thankfully, I found my tribe and the voices I needed to push me towards purpose, coupled with prayer.

If you are stuck in a fixed mindset, here are a few practical steps to move forward:

• Identify the root or limiting belief in your story.
• Be aware of your thoughts. Mindset leads to feelings, which lead to actions, which lead to beliefs.
• Forgive yourself for all mistakes/shortcomings.
• Set measurable goals.
• Create affirmations.
• Be consistent and disciplined.
• When you fall, forgive yourself and move through the remaining points.

As we move into 2021, the month of December is a great time to take inventory of your thought processes and mindset. Do you have a fixed mindset? If so, it could be limiting your growth and enjoyment of life. If you have a growth mindset, may you continue to thrive in your purpose!

Leave a reply (below): Author Travis Bradberry said, “People with a growth mindset believe that they can improve with effort. They outperform those with a fixed mindset, even when they have a lower IQ, because they embrace challenges, treating them as opportunities to learn something new.” Do you agree that embracing challenges and treating them as opportunities are traits of someone with a growth mindset? What other traits are seen in those with a growth mindset?